Today I Am A Static Queen

It’s that time of year: the temperature drops to below freezing and the humidity level is about 4. I pull on sweater and hear that snapping sound as it goes over my head–and there I am: The Static Queen

static queen


Things stick to me: bits of paper, threads and lint from the floor and under furniture leap on as I walk by. I am a sobering sight.
It’s uncomfortable being a Static Queen. There’s this force field that shocks others if I come into contact. My sons and husband are keeping me at a five foot safety zone and the dogs run to another room when I pass through.
I’ve made the “I’m a loner” statement many times but my Static Queen state shows me how lonely that can be.
Just so relieved that Tom and I decided to commit to only one day to each other. I’d hate to think what my static force field might do to his passing arm and I’d really hate to see what static does to his beautiful head of rock-god hair.

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About EF Sweetman

bees, baseball, beverly, ma, culture, manners, society, writing
This entry was posted in 1, blogging, Blogroll, cautionary tales, Dogs, family, Fashion, humor, Men, Observations, pets, writing and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Today I Am A Static Queen

  1. TheIdiotSpeaketh says:

    Maybe it’s just that “electric personality” of yours….

    Nah….your right…it’s the static! 🙂

    – Maaaaaaaahkkkyyyy Maaaahhhhhkkkkkkkk

  2. sweetman says:

    It’s totally my personality.

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