Urban Dictionary #3 “Wall of Shame”

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Urban Dictionary
Wall of Shame

Part or all of a bulletin board in schools, post offices and libraries that display the rap sheet and photo of sexual offenders who live within a ten mile zone.

“Guess who’s on the Wall of Shame at the Post Office? That creepy housekeeper from work!”

“I knew there was something way off about that perv!”

I am rewriting my epitah to actually include something close to the truth: I am a bona fide contributer to Urban Dictionary.
I’d say three definitions make me legitimate, wouldn’t you agree?
Here’s my acceptance speech for the highest literary award ever imagined. Attendees will be about a million adoring fans and will include George Clooney, Tom Jones, Jason Varitek and a couple of girls who’ve made fun of me in the past.
“It’s an unexpected career path, incredibly… rewarding to know I’ve given so much to so many. I look in the mirror every morning and ask myself, “How did you get so gifted?” How? Certainly my basement-dwelling parents had little to do with this miracle that is me!
” Well, I believe it’s best not to question the higher powers of lexicon. I’ll just let it keep flowing. I believe I’m a portal, a lowly messenger that brings you such gems as “Porn Twit”, “That’s Bullshit!” and now “The Wall of Shame”.
“Move over Bard, Dickens, Miss Austen, there’s a new giant on the horizon and that giant is standing before you. Humble, grateful, full of more words that will change your lives. (deep breath to controll the shakiness of my voice) Oh, don’t worry, I wont’ forget those who helped me get here, I love you all!
“Thank you, thank you, (crying) Thank You!!!” (as I’m dragged away from the microphone)


About EF Sweetman

bees, baseball, beverly, ma, culture, manners, society, writing
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